Myšlení

Been a while since I've posted anything.

Have been very busy with schoolwork, especially my English coursework. I knew an online class would have a lot of writing to do, as well as an English class - but my brain is starting to just shut down. And so I plod along, procrastinating and trying to force myself to get work done. So far I'm doing okay, let's hope I don't collapse during midterms. Thank god none of them are on the same day as another, so it's one at a time.

Let's see. I've also been going out with a new guy - Data is his actual name. We've known each other for almost a year now, but we just started to date about a month ago. My commitment issues are trying to rear their ugly head and almost find ways to make me run for it, but I'm having none of it. I just unload on my two best friends and get some help for it. Usually I'm the one to say, "go with your gut," but not in this case when I know it's just bad past experiences clouding my judgment and not instinct. He's really sweet and I can tell he cares about me. I just need to teach him that he doesn't have to take me out to places to show that - I just want respect, which he gives me.

Recently told a friend quite a lot of frankly unbelievable things about myself and the world in general. I hope she'll eventually  believe me, after thinking it all over, but if she doesn't it's okay. It was more the fact I felt bad hiding things from her. If she decides it's all too much, then that's the last she'll ever hear of it. I just wanted things out in the open. And what's scary is she told me she knew I was hiding something from her - that only made me feel worse. So we'll see where it all goes, I'm just glad I was honest in the end no matter where it leads.

It's NFL jersey day at my old campus. I even borrowed a Giants jersey from said friend to wear today, so when I get into fights with Steelers and Cowboys fans they know why - and then realized I have a paper to finish and if I went I'd never get it done. So, no fights for me today. It's also raining, so I hope it isn't going to be really bad tonight. I don't mind driving in rain - it's the reflections and not being able to see the lines on the road that I hate.

All right, I've used this blog as an excuse to procrastinate enough. I'm getting back into my writing mood too, so hopefully this paper will be done soon and I can go eat.